Wednesday, April 26, 2017

Gonna Finish What I Started

About four months before Joel suddenly went Home to Heaven, we had embarked upon a health journey together. While our journeys were a bit different in the specifics, the end result intention was to be the same…we longed to get to get to the healthiest adult versions of ourselves we’ve ever seen (or at least get as close as we safely could).

Austyn’s adoption party! Just so happens to also be the day I was at my very largest…ever. 🙁

My biggest cheerleader in this fight for good health was my precious man! During the time we were were married, I had been up and down on the scale repeatedly (which, in and of itself, is not healthy). He never doubted me. Never doubted my ability to get to a healthy weight and stay there. Never doubted my goal of running my first 5K someday. (I was scheduled to participate in one several years ago, which sadly ended up being the day of my previous husband’s funeral.) He never doubted anything I set my mind to do. However, I was my own worst critic. I guess I’ve tried and failed at so many different things in the past that I began to believe that was my “lot in life”. Attempting, yet never reaching the prize.

Upon Joel’s death, I promised him I wouldn’t stop. I would hold up my end of the deal, no matter how the large the challenges I encountered (and boy…have there been challenges!). I so long to please him, to please God, and to please myself. And…ultimately, our children need their mama to be around for a long time, God willing.

So, I’m excited to announce that since October, I’ve lost 70 pounds! Aside from the trauma I’ve also experienced over the last several months, I really do feel great! Now…Joel had promised me little rewards with each measurable goal that I reach along the journey. While I don’t have him to do that for me anymore, I’m asking God to step in as the husband He’s promised to be and provide little pick-me-ups as He sees fit. He, of all people knows the incentives that will keep me motivated.

I’m getting there…little by little. Considering all I’ve endured since my health journey began, I think I’ve held out okay.

As for you…if you are a praying friend, will you fervently join me in asking God to help me reach me the Goals He has for me please?! I so want to continue to please Joel, and I trust God will give him (Joel) a little glimpse when this is all said and done. Thank you friends!

#HeIsStillGood